Royal Pain
by Persiana13
Summary: Set in L1701E's Misfit-verse. A monarch from Atlantis kidnaps a West Coast Avenger and attempts to make her his bride. Introducing Namor.
1. Chapter 1

**Royal Pain **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel or Sunbow Entertainment. I own Farrah/Persiana and Leon/Crisis. _

Chapter 1: A Matter of Taste 

Crystal was a bubbly teen princess of a race of people called the Inhumans; humans who gained powers from the Terrigen Mists. These mists were the result of Kree experimentation millennia ago, and, once an Inhuman is born, they are exposed to the mists to gain fantastic new powers. For Crystal, it was the power of earth, fire, wind, and water. Though she could not master any one particular element to the extent of someone like Avalanche or Pyro, she could certainly hold her own.

Crystal was petting Lockjaw, an Inhuman who got turned into a dog, but gained fantastic teleportation abilities. The two were waiting for some other members of the royal family in the palace in the Himalayan Mountains. Crystal shook her head,

"I wonder what Medusa wanted to see me for."

It did not take long for that thought to be answered when the doors to the palace opened and, escorted by royal guards, appeared a woman with a striking figure and long, flowing red hair that flowed down to the ground. It seemed to move on its own as the woman came toward Crystal. She smiled warmly,

"Crystal."

Crystal waved back,

"Hi, Medusa."

Medusa was Crystal's older sister and married to Black Bolt, king of the Inhumans. Medusa was also a guest amongst the Fantastic Four, even going so far as to become a member when Susan Richards, the Invisible Woman, had a difference of opinion with her husband on a personal issue. It was through this connection that Crystal was introduced to Johnny Storm. However, Crystal had her sights set on Quicksilver now.

The red-headed monarch asked,

"Crystal, how is it in the land called California?"

Crystal smiled,

"It's great! It's so warm and gorgeous and my friends are all there for me."

She sighed happily,

"It's the perfect place to raise a child when I marry Quicksilver!"

Medusa swallowed at that and walked with her younger sister,

"Crystal, I have to talk to you about that…infatuation."

It was a difficult subject to talk about in Attilan, the city of the Inhumans. There was no doubt that the idea of Crystal and Quicksilver courting was a controversial one, especially considering that Quicksilver was not like the Inhumans. There was a fear of the royal blood being contaminated with that of a lower being. Medusa addressed this concern,

"There are many here that fear that this infatuation will be fleeting, like the time Johnny Storm was courting you."

The blonde spun around, almost shouting,

"He and I are through! He dumped me for some Skrull witch when I was trapped here!"  
Her shouting echoed throughout the halls of the palace, which caused some of the royal guards to wince. Medusa shook her head,

"All I am saying, dear sister, is that you find a man in your life that is more…regal. What about the prince of Atlantis?"

Crystal wretched,

"Namor? Medusa, I know you are just looking out for me, but Namor? Why him?"  
Medusa explained,

"He is of royal blood, as you are. Quicksilver is not."  
The elementalle shook her head,

"No, I've made up my mind! Quicksilver is the man for me, and Leon says when we get married, we're having a daughter."

She turned to Lockjaw and said,

"Let's go, Lockjaw."

As the two vanished away, Medusa sighed, shaking her head,

"Oh, this will not be good."

**Meanwhile… **

In the depths of the ocean, a lone figure stood watching over a monitoring device. He had a bored expression on his face. He was the teen prince of Atlantis, Namor, the Sub-Mariner.

The Sub-Mariner's history extended back to World War II, where he, along with Captain America and others known as the Invaders, fought the Nazis and won. Namor returned to life in the ocean, spending time amongst the sea life. He shook his head, saying out loud,

"And, why would you have me watch this?"  
A caped figure wearing a cowl over his head answered,

"To show you that, to survive the surface world dwellers, one must create a child with them that can survive both on land and in the sea, my lord. Perhaps, if one were to be strong and have prestige, then that one woman could sire a generation of powerful children to rule both the land and sea."

Namor's new 'advisor' was shady and devious, but the prince could not deny he was right; the surface world dwellers were infringing on his territory every day, and it was only a matter of time before they would take over Atlantis. Namor nodded,

"I see. I should attempt to take this Crystal and make her my bride."

The 'advisor' nodded,

"Of course, sire."

The black-clad wearing Atlantian then stood up and, wielding his trident, took to the ocean currents.

If only Namor realized with whom he was conversing with. It was a devious shadow and the insidious god of trickery Loki…

Next Chapter:  
Let's take a look at some more insanity with the West Coast Avengers! Stay tuned, fellow readers!


	2. Chapter 2

**Royal Pain **

_Disclaimer: All Familiar characters belong to Marvel or Sunbow Entertainment. I own Farrah/Persiana and Leon/Crisis. Red Witch owns the Misfits! _

Chapter 2: Lovely Things 

Farrah Willows was the white-haired feline acrobat Persiana, a member of the heroic West Coast Avengers. She and Carol Danvers, the blonde Air Force brat Miss Marvel, were heated rivals and often would exchange punches and heated words over a boy they both had affections for. However, while Farrah would have normally indulged in making a fool out of her teammate, she was presently making a phone call to the East Coast Misfits base. Specifically, she was calling Shipwreck, a member of G.I. Joe. She had an amazing prank she was going to pull.

The phone rang several times before a drunken Shipwreck answered,

"Hi, ma!"

Persiana blinked at that and snickered away from the line. She said,

"This is your mother, Shipwreck. I know how much you love that woman Storm and I heard an interesting thing!"

Shipwreck laughed,

"Right, ma! I love Stormy so much! She just doesn't even know it yet!"

Farrah continued,

"I know. That's what I'm calling to tell you about a really rare plant that only grows during hurricane season. If you mix it with some other herbs, you can make a love potion."

Shipwreck stumbled with the phone and nodded,

"Yep! I know the plant, and I'm heading out there right now!"

Farrah added,

"And you should go during a major hurricane."

The phone then clicked and Shipwreck, struggling to straighten himself up, declared,

"I shall take the advantage and go into the most powerful hurricane, all for my Storm!"

He stumbled out of the room drunkenly, but stopped and saluted the American flag as he left.

Farrah put the phone down and began laughing hysterically. She clutched her sides as she said,

"Oh, that Shipwreck! That was too easy!"

Leon Maxwell, Farrah's boyfriend and the powerhouse teen Crisis, walked in,

"What's with all the laughter?"

Farrah continued laughing, trying to get a word in. When she finally calmed down, the lioness explained,

"You see, Shipwreck was drunk and he thought I was his mother calling, so, naturally, I told him that a really rare flower grows in the midst of hurricane season and that he should try and harvest this flower during the strongest storm possible!"  
Leon blinked and shook his head,

"Sometimes, Farrah, I question your sanity."

Farrah continued,

"And, the best part is, he actually believed it and is probably now heading into the eye of the biggest hurricane of the year!"  
She then returned to her laughing fit. Leon rubbed the bridge of his nose,

"Farrah, once Shipwreck finds out that the call came here, he is going to make a beeline for us. You especially."  
Persiana stood up and hugged her boyfriend,

"But, I'll have you to protect me through it all."

Leon sighed, shaking his head. Farrah tilted her head and asked,

"Are you bothered by something?"

The red-eyed teen sat down,

"Ever since that time with Cobra, I feel like a lot more people are watching me. Rhody has talked about replacing me in the field while I work out these flare-ups."  
The white-haired cat-girl rested her head on her boyfriend's chest,

"No one can replace you, Leon. You're part of this team, and, when you do get control of these flare-ups, we won't need a replacement."

Leon chuckled,

"Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. I've heard that the field replacement is going to be here in a few days."

He looked up at the ceiling,

"I hope it's someone we can trust."

Farrah had a sly smile on her face as she said,

"How about I take your mind off of all of it, honey?"

With that, she mashed her lips with his, inducing a full-blown make-out kiss, right on the sofa.

**Elsewhere… **

Namor was swimming along the depths of the ocean. He knew that winning Crystal's heart was not going to be an easy task, and he dare not take the approach he did when he attempted to seduce Susan Richards, the Fantastic Four member the Invisible Woman. That ended with him taking on the entire Fantastic Four, an unwise course of action. Instead, Namor was going to attempt to be more charming and more presentable.

He swam into the depths of a cave and surfaced. He knew of an exotic flower that seemingly grew without sunlight and along the cave walls. Namor picked a few of these flowers and nodded,

"Yes, these will do nicely for my attempts at Crystal."  
He tucked them into a specially made sack and, holding a conch horn, began swimming to his destination; the West Coast Avengers' Compound…

Next Chapter:

Shipwreck continues his quest at the behest of his 'mother', and Namor finally surfaces. Stay tuned, fellow readers!


	3. Chapter 3

**Royal Pain **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel or Sunbow Entertainment. I own Farrah/Persiana and Leon/Crisis. Red Witch owns the Misfits. _

Chapter 3: Surfacing 

Althea Delgado, the leader of the East Coast Misfits Wavedancer, shook her head as she walked along the halls of Misfit Manor. The hydrokinetic mutant grumbled to herself,

"My idiot father is missing again. Where could he have gone? Wait, should I know? Or, am I better off not knowing?"  
Not too far away, Shipwreck, clearly drunk out of his mind, had wandered into the laundry room, which he thought was the supply closet. He stupidly said,

"Now, where did I leave my raft?"

He opened the washer and peeked inside. Just as he did, the door opened behind him and he fell inside the washer. Fred Dukes, the massive mutant Blob, was stuck doing the Misfits' laundry today. He tumbled in the pile of dirty clothes, seemingly oblivious to the sounds of Shipwreck being buried underneath the basket of sweaty clothes. Blob then read the instructions that were given to him,

"OK, I filled the washer, now I have to add the detergent and turn it on."

He looked at the bottle of laundry detergent, a thick, blue liquid. He poured the entire contents into the washer and, carefully turning the knob, started the laundry, and left.

**Meanwhile… **

Crystal, the inhuman elementalle princess, screamed,

"JOHNNY STORM, LEAVE ME ALONE!"  
She was angrily ripping up another love letter and stormed into the room Farrah and Leon were in, making out. The princess was angry,

"When does he take a hint to leave me alone?! Quicksilver is the only man for me!"

She then noticed her two teammates on the couch, kissing, and she pouted,

"Why can't my Pietro and I do that whenever I see him? All he does is run away and I have to chase him down!"

She stomped out of the room. Leon pulled away from Farrah and asked,

"Did you hear something?"  
The were-lioness shook her head,

"Nope. Now, let's get back to this."

And the kissing continued…

**Meanwhile… **

Carol Danvers, the Air Force brat Miss Marvel, was walking along the beach front of the compound. She picked up a rock and the powerhouse threw it a considerable distance into the water. The blonde sighed,

"Leon is never going to want to have a relationship with me. And, it's all because of that stupid hairball."

She clenched her fist, snarling,

"She's a walking pity party, and Leon is so blind to see that. What is it going to take for him to leave her and kiss me the way he kisses her?"

It was around this time that Namor had surfaced out over the water and looked around,

"The compound is this way. I will now attempt-."  
Just then, the rock that Miss Marvel threw landed on his head. Though the rock bounced off harmlessly, the prince of Atlantis was mad,

"Who dares such madness against me?"

He noticed a figure off on the beach and, he flew with all due haste.

It was not long before Carol took notice to something coming at her. She braced for a fight and saw the winged-foot Namor land, holding what appeared to be numerous sea flowers. The prince of Atlantis asked,

"Was it you that threw that rock at me, surface dweller?"

Carol shook her head,

"I didn't mean to throw it at you."

Her expression darkened,

"And you're Namor, the prince of Atlantis. I heard about you."

Namor studied the teen girl for a moment. He did not know why, but there was something about Carol that was capturing his attention. She was gorgeous; a strong woman, curvy and capable of fighting with the best. The prince dropped his flowers and thought to himself,

_Why have Crystal, when I have heard so much about Miss Marvel? She is as strong as I am. Think of our children. _

Carol blinked,

"Uh, are you all right?"

Namor then bowed and said,

"Forgive me, Miss Marvel. Yes, I am Prince Namor, the Sub-mariner, and I have heard much of you, a heroine from the surface world."

Carol blushed slightly at that, which only seemed to make her more attractive, or so Namor thought. The Sub-mariner approached Carol and said,

"You are a very attractive young woman, Miss Marvel."

The blonde's blush reddened as Namor continued,

"And you would make a fine wife for our children."

Next Chapter:  
Shipwreck continues to search for the 'flower' that grows in a hurricane, and Miss Marvel responds to Namor's offer. Stay tuned, fellow readers!


	4. Chapter 4

**Royal Pain **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel or Sunbow Entertainment. I own Farrah/Persiana and Leon/Crisis. _

Chapter 4: Second Thoughts 

Carol was a bit surprised at Namor's forwardness,

"You want to marry me?"  
The prince of Atlantis nodded,

"Yes, and bear my children. Our future generations would bring Atlantis into a new Golden Age."

The blonde Air Force brat blinked a couple of times before she shook her head,

"To be truthful, your highness, I'm flattered you like me so much, but, I have eyes for one man right now."

As she turned away, Miss Marvel felt her arm get tugged. Namor had a dark expression on his face and he glared at her,

"You will come back with me to be my bride. I will not be denied what is mine."

**Inside… **

Farrah and Leon had stopped kissing and the cat-girl was resting her head on the red-eyed teen's chest. Persiana sighed happily,

"Wonderful."

She looked up,

"You really are a good kisser, Leon. I'm glad you only belong to me."

Just then, her ears twitched. Leon looked at her,

"What's wrong?"

Farrah sat up,

"I heard something."  
Something came through the wall suddenly, sailing over the two teens. Namor was thrown into a wall.

Pulsar's voice roared,

"RHODY, I SWEAR, IF YOU'RE AFTER THAT FLY AGAIN-!"

Real name Monica Rambeau, the light-powered heroine came flying in and looked at the mess,

"What happened?"

Namor stumbled to his feet and cracked his knuckles,

"The prince of Atlantis will not so easily be swayed."  
Crisis and Persiana braced for a fight as Miss Marvel came in,

"Forget it! I'm not marrying you and I'm not having your kids!"  
At this, the white-furred feline blinked,

"Wait, what? What happened?"  
She looked at Namor,

"You want to marry her?"

Even Leon was a bit surprised,

"Seriously?"  
Namor nodded,

"Yes, and she will be coming back to Atlantis with me."

Farrah grinned,

"Well, that'd be one less rival for me to deal with. By all means, take her!"

Leon looked at his girlfriend,

"Farrah!"  
Persiana shrugged,

"What? What'd I say?"

Pulsar shook her head,

"No, we can't just let Namor take one of our teammates."

Farrah whined,

"But, she's so annoying! She's constantly after my man!"  
Carol shot back,

"You don't deserve him, hairball! He's better off with me!"

Namor looked at Crisis,

"You are the man Carol is seeing?"

Carol smiled while Farrah was irate. Leon shook his head,

"It's not like that. I'm dating Farrah."  
Namor nodded in understanding,

"So, you have no claim to Miss Marvel then, don't you?"

Leon shook his head,

"If by that, you mean I'm dating her, then, no, I'm not. But, she's still a teammate of mine and I'm not letting you take her."

The prince of Atlantis shook his head,

"If you have no claim to Miss Marvel, surface dweller, then you should get out of my way. I will claim Miss Marvel and we will return to Atlantis."

Pulsar said,

"We can't let you do that, Namor."

Namor scowled and roared,

"YOU SHALL REGRET THIS TRANSGRESSION, SURFACE DWELLERS!"  
He speared Crisis out of the room, Miss Marvel and Persiana both following. Pulsar radioed in,

"All West Coast Avengers, you're needed at the compound. We're under attack!"

She shook her head,

"I hope they get here soon."

**Outside… **

Crisis was tossed to the ground hard, landing near the beach. Farrah went to his aid, while Carol slammed a massive uppercut into Namor's chin,

"Leave him alone!"

Namor took the hit, but landed in the water. Seconds later, he shot out of the water and grabbed Miss Marvel,

"You are strong, but, you forget, I heal in water rather nicely."

He restrained her as best he could, and Carol tried to fight it, but the two of them were getting closer and closer to the water. The blonde read up on Namor and he was nearly invincible in the water. She screamed,

"Help!"  
Just as they were about to dip below the surface, Pulsar shot an energy beam at Namor, separating the two of them. Namor then plunged into the water, leaving Carol to wash up on the beach. She clutched her arm as she had been restrained strongly by the prince of Atlantis.

However, as Namor watched what was going on from a nearby cove, he glared daggers at the West Coast Avengers. This was far from over…

Next Chapter:

Namor returns to Atlantis and plots on how to capture Miss Marvel. Plus, more insanity with the Misfits! Stay tuned, fellow readers!


	5. Chapter 5

**Royal Pain **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel or Sunbow Entertainment. I own Farrah/Persiana and Leon/Crisis. Red Witch owns the Misfits. _

Chapter 5: Steal of a Lifetime 

**At the Pit… **

Beachhead, a member of G.I. Joe and an Army Ranger, was walking with General Hawk, the base commander, explaining,

"But, Hawk, I need a tank to protect Sergeant Snuggles from Pyro."

Hawk looked at the teddy bear-loving ranger,

"Beachhead, you can't request a tank for that purpose. Besides, Pyro would just burn through the metal of the tank and set you and the bear on fire."

He then added,

"Although, to be honest, seeing you get set on fire would be the highlight of my otherwise disastrous day. Now, put that tank back where it belongs."

The two stepped outside and Beachhead blinked,

"Wait, the tank was right here. I know I parked it right here."

He began scratching his head, and then noticed Sergeant Snuggles on the ground. Quickly, Beachhead screamed,

"Sarge!"

He clutched the bear and yelled,

"YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE GUARDING THE TANK! WHAT HAPPENED TO IT?!"  
Hawk blinked,

"You had your bear guarding military property?"  
Beachhead put the teddy bear close to his ear and said,

"Sarge said he was overpowered by some crazy blonde girl. She took the tank. But, who could it have been?"  
Wavedancer came up to them,

"Uh, Hawk. I just was watching the news and you have to see this for yourself."

In a few minutes, Hawk, Beachhead, as well as several other Misfits and Joes were watching footage of downtown New York City. There, they saw Johnny Storm, the Human Torch, running for his life,

"AAHHH! IT WAS ONLY A LOVE LETTER!"  
Crystal, the Inhuman princess, roared,

"COME BACK HERE SO I CAN SQUISH YOU! I LOVE QUICKSILVER AND WE'RE GOING TO GET MARRIED! LEAVE ME ALONE!"  
The Human Torch was running fast, but the tank was causing all sorts of destruction as it ran over cars. Crystal then fired the main gun at Johnny. Though the shot missed, it did leave a crater in the middle of the road.

Wanda Maximoff, the Scarlet Witch, looked at her brother,

"You girlfriend is out of her mind, more so than usual."

Pietro, the mutant Quicksilver, shook his head,

"And, what do you expect me to do about that?"

Hawk smiled,

"Easy. You and Beachhead go get the tank back."  
Beachhead looked aghast,

"Are you out of your mind?! Wait, don't answer that!"

Wanda teased,

"Don't worry; Sergeant Snuggles can watch your back."

Althea folded her arms, smirking,

"Yeah."

Both Quicksilver and Beachhead sighed; this was going to be difficult.

**Meanwhile… **

Pulsar was on the phone,

"Gyrich, I have no idea how Crystal got onto a military base and stole a tank. I called her, but she's not responding. Yes, I'm watching it right now."

Sam Wilson, the teen hero Falcon, and Hercules, the teen god of strength, were laughing hysterically as to the events that transpired with Namor. The former gang member chuckled,

"So, is Carol having a new boyfriend or what?"

Leon grumbled,

"I'm so glad you're enjoying this. That Namor was tough."

He winced, feeling a slight friction burn in his back after being body-slammed by the prince of Atlantis. Hercules smirked,

"A worthy challenge for the son of Zeus! I shall enjoy beating him as we fight!"

Persiana's maniacal laughter cut through the air as she pranced in,

"Guess what? I found a new use for that photo program!"  
She handed Carol a picture of the blonde Air Force brat looking like a fish creature, complete with scales and ugly, fish-like eyes. The skin was also green, and had large, inflated breasts. The feral feline giggled,

"I'm thinking about posting it on the net. What do you think, Barbie?!"  
Miss Marvel screamed,

"Hairball, you had better not try it!"  
The other West Coast Avengers looked at the photo and began laughing, including Leon. The red-eyed teen shook his head, clutching his sides,

"You have to admit, it is kind of funny to see Namor have a thing for you."

Carol pointed a finger at Leon,

"You're lucky I like you so much."

She then turned around, and jumped Persiana,

"You're dead, furball!"  
And the chase began, Carol wanting to throttle her teammate and rival into submission. Natasha Romanoff, the super spy Avenger Black Widow, shook her head,

"Should we be concerned that Crystal is running around with a tank, trying to kill Johnny Storm?"

Falcon shrugged,

"I don't see why we should interfere in that. Clearly, it's an internal problem. Besides, what happens if Namor tries something? We need to be ready."

A loud crash was heard and the avian teen shrugged,

"Well, at least most of us should."

Next Chapter:

Namor hatches a plan to ensure he marries Miss Marvel! Insanity Ensues! Stay tuned, fellow readers!


	6. Chapter 6

**Royal Pain **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel or Sunbow Entertainment. I own Farrah/Persiana and Leon/Crisis. Red Witch owns the Misfits! _

Chapter 6: Capturing the Heart 

**A beach somewhere in New York… **

Quicksilver and Beachhead were tasked with retrieving the tank that the masked soldier requested to use to protect his teddy bear Sergeant Snuggles. The speeding mutant grumbled

"Why did I have to come along, anyway?"

Beachhead shook his head,

"Because you could get here the fastest. Now, help me with this thing."

The Army Ranger went inside the tank to try and find out what the damage was while Quicksilver waited. The former Brotherhood member hated waiting. It was near torture and he kept whining,

"Have you figured it out yet?"

Beachhead raised his head to say something but then hit it on one of the metal beams inside the tank. He groaned,

"OW!"  
Holding his head, he popped out of the tank and said,

"Now, let's get this thing off of the rock wall before-."

Just then, Namor flew overhead and landed near the two of them…

**Earlier… **

Namor had returned to his den after his defeat at the hands of the West Coast Avengers. His advisor asked,

"Sire, what happened?"

The teen prince shook his head,

"I found a beautiful woman to bear my children, but now, she has rejected me. How can she reject royalty like that?"

Loki, still in his guise as royal advisor, answered,

"Why not kidnap Quicksilver, and make them trade him for one Miss Marvel?"

Namor raised his eyebrow in skepticism,

"Are you sure that will work?"  
The advisor nodded,

"Of course, sire. It will happen."

**End Flashback… **

Namor looked at them,

"You are coming with me to Atlantis."

Quicksilver pointed a finger at Namor,

"Now, see here. I am the great Quicksilver, and no one tells me what to-."

Namor grabbed the speedster's finger and broke it. Pietro screamed,

"AAAHHH! THAT HURT!"  
He was then knocked unconscious. Beachhead tried to radio in for help, but he too was incapacitated. Then, Namor brought the two of them to the depths of his palace…

**Meanwhile, in San Diego… **

Carol was still chasing down her nemesis,

"Get back here, hair ball! I'm not done beating you up yet!"  
Farrah was running as fast as she could, cackling all the way as she did,

"Hey, Barbie! I always knew you were a gold digger, but this takes the cake!"

Crisis, Hercules, Falcon, and Black Widow all watched the chase go by. Natasha asked,

"How long has this been going on?"

The red-eyed teen sighed,

"A while. It got bad when Carol mentioned Wendigo and Farrah just when ballistic and posted that mock-up creation on-line."

Crystal then teleported in with Lockjaw and she dusted her hands,

"That will teach Johnny Storm to leave me alone."  
Sam cracked up laughing,

"Loved how you did that, Crys."

The super-spy teen asked,

"Where did you get a tank?"

The blonde princess shrugged,

"Well, you see, I was going to visit Quicksilver and ask him to help me beat up Johnny, but then, I saw this tank sitting outside this building and decided to take that instead."

Leon asked,

"Did you put the tank back where it belonged?"

Crystal blinked and shook her head,

"I knew I forgot something."

Lockjaw barked and Crystal patted him on the head,

"Good boy, Lockjaw."

A loud crash was heard and two familiar female voices were shouting at each other. Crystal asked,

"What happened?"

Natasha explained,

"We received a visit from Namor and he was intent on taking Carol back to Atlantis to be his bride. And, Farrah has been making jokes about it ever since."

Crystal rolled her eyes,

"I know what you mean. Namor tried to propose to me too."

Hercules was surprised,

"Really?"

The elementalle princess shook her head,

"Yes, it was my sister's idea. It is supposed to keep the royal blood-line pure or something. I could never understand it."

Leon shrugged,

"It could be worse."

Just then, the television switched on and Namor appeared on it,

"West Coast Avengers, I have captured two surface dwellers."

The camera then panned to a hog-tied Beachhead and Quicksilver. Namor then continued,

"If Miss Marvel does not surrender to me and become my wife, I kill these two."

A coral sword was placed near Quicksilver's throat. The silver-haired speedster wept,

"Help! I'm too pretty to die! Get me out of here!"

Crisis shook his head,

"I really have to keep my mouth shut."

Falcon smirked,

"For a guy with precognition, you seriously don't see a whole lot of things coming."

Leon glared back at the avian teen,

"Shut up, Falcon."

Next Chapter:

How will the West Coast Avengers handle this? And, will Shipwreck ever find that flower he's been looking for? Stay tuned, fellow readers!


	7. Chapter 7

**Royal Pain **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel or Sunbow Entertainment. I own Farrah/Persiana and Leon/Crisis. Red Witch owns the Misfits! _

Chapter 7: Trade Off 

**At Misfit Manor… **

Blob and Dragonfly were walking back to the laundry room. It was time now to put the laundry into the drier so it could be nice and fresh. The massive mutant floundered his way down the hall, carrying the basket, his insect-like girlfriend near him. Lina asked,

"Are you sure you did everything I wrote down?"

Fred looked at Lina,

"I think I did. I mean, I did follow the directions and put all the soap in."

Lina stood in front of him,

"Wait, you put the entire bottle of detergent in the washer?"  
The strong Texan nodded,

"Yeah, why?"

Just then, the laundry door opened and a torrent of water and suds, as well as the laundry that was in it, began flooding and cresting down the hallway. Also, there was a drunken Shipwreck floating along and, in his inebriated state, was singing love songs about Storm.

Wanda came out of a room, just in time to be swept away by the gushing water.

Shipwreck stood up and shook the water out of his clothes. He then tilted his hat and proclaimed,

"I have survived the hurricane and have found the flower that grows within its eye!"

He was holding up the tumbler to the washer, which was a neon-blue color. Wanda looked up, her clothes soaking in water,

"What happened? Who did all this?"

Lina and Fred both looked at each other. The Blob winced,

"I think it would be a good time for me to run."

Dragonfly shook her head,

"Wait, maybe Wanda won't get angry."

The hex-mistress looked up at the rotund mutant and, with a fake smile, walked up to him and said,

"Blob, I know you were trying to do your best, so I won't punish you. But, my clothes are soaked, so I'm going to work off all my frustration on the training course."

A few moments later, a loud string of curses and explosions could be heard all over the base as the Scarlet Witch was destroying the obstacle course with her powers. Blob sighed in relief,

"I guess those meditation lessons Wanda is learning are paying off."

He winced at the sound of Airtight screaming,

"MY LAB! WHAT HAPPENED TO MY LAB?!"

**At the West Coast Compound… **

Crystal looked on in horror,

"We have to do something!"

She began running around in a panic,

"If I do not rescue Quicksilver, I will never be married to him, and I will not be able to have his babies! And, if I do not have his babies, I will die!"

She frantically ran around the room, hyperventilating. The princess of the Inhumans was worried about the love of her life, obviously. Natasha said,

"Well, we certainly just can't hand Carol over to Namor."

Farrah whined,

"Why not? I don't see what the problem is. Namor gets Carol, and Crystal gets her man. I'd say it's a win-win."

Carol snarled,

"You would like that, wouldn't you?"

The white-haired lioness smugly smirked back,

"Of course I would. I'd be finally rid of you once and for all."

Pulsar looked at the teen Avengers,

"I have to agree. We aren't going to hand over Miss Marvel."

Leon looked up from his seat,

"Actually, that's exactly what we should do."

Everyone looked at the red-eyed teen swordsman. Carol was stunned,

"Are you serious?"

Farrah looked up to the sky,

"Yes, he finally sees the light!"  
Natasha shook her head, surprised,

"Leon, I understand you are not attracted to Carol, but this goes beyond-."  
Crisis shook his head,

"Hear me out. I have an idea, and it just might work."

Falcon groaned,

"Here we go again. The last time he had one of his crazy ideas, we ended up stealing a tank and testing out if it could fly." (1)

Leon rubbed the bridge of his nose,

"Are you still on that? Besides, it was your idea to steal the thing in the first place. I wanted nothing to do with that!"

Farrah quipped,

"And yet, somehow, you got into as much trouble as we did for that stunt. Which, by the way, was totally worth it."

Crystal said,

"Does this plan guarantee getting my Pietro back?"

Crisis had a sinister grin on his face,

"All that and more. Now, here's what we're going to do…"

Next Chapter:

Crisis hatches his plan on rescuing Quicksilver! Stay tuned, fellow readers!

(1) This happened in Imitating Life


	8. Chapter 8

**Royal Pain **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel or Sunbow Entertainment. I own Farrah/Persiana and Leon/Crisis. _

Chapter 8: A Bell Rung 

The basement of the West Coast Avengers compound was converted into a wedding chapel, complete with aisles and flowers and various decorations. Falcon was setting up the video camera as he looked at his teammate Crisis,

"Tell me again why this is such a good idea?"

Leon explained,

"It's simple. Hercules and Carol will get married, forcing Namor to come after them."

The prince of Wakanda asked,

"And what is to stop Namor from tearing them apart?"  
The red-eyed teen explained,

"Easy. He probably figures on watching this broadcast, so, while he's off trying to stop this wedding, Wonder Man and Vision will go down to the depths and find Quicksilver and Beachhead."

Crystal asked,

"Would it not be easier if we called G.I. Joe and let them handle this?"

Leon said,

"It involves us, or, more specifically, Miss Marvel. Besides…"

He had a grin on his face,

"I've always wanted to tape a wedding."

Farrah walked in with a clipboard,

"Let's see; the color of those drapes has to go, and the benches…"

She reared her claws and scratched one right through, collapsing in a heap of splinters. The white-haired acrobat shook her head,

"They are not scratch resistant."

Persiana looked up,

"Did we use particle board for this crap? I want nothing less than solid oak for my wedding."

Carol walked in, grumbling,

"I don't want to do this! It's not right! I should be marrying you, Leon!"  
Farrah snarled,

"Not going to happen, since he's marrying ME!"  
Leon got in-between them,

"Girls, that's enough!"

He calmly explained,

"Carol, it has to be with Hercules. Imagine the jealous rage that'll happen if Namor realizes he got dumped so you could be with a god."

Hercules waltzed in, wearing a sleeveless tuxedo and carrying his mace,

"Hah! Never fret, fair Carol! The Lion of Olympus shall protect you!"

Carol then looked at the long-haired Olympian god of Strength and groaned,

"This is going to be the worse day of my life."

Farrah held up a camera,

"And I'll be here to record every second of it. Just think of the hits I'll get when this tape goes viral."

Carol clenched her fists,

"I'll show you a hit, you walking flea circus!"

Leon restrained his blonde teammate and said,

"Carol, no. We can't risk you getting a black-eye right now."

Carol knew Leon was right, but glared at her rival,

"When this is over, hairball, I'm going to wear you like a fur coat."

Farrah glared back,

"Try it, Barbie."

T'challa shook his head,

"Why do I have the feeling that this will end in anything but a good way?"

**Meanwhile… **

Namor was sitting on his throne, contemplating. Quicksilver and Beachhead were tied up and at the mercy of the ruler of Atlantis. The Sub-mariner checked the time,

"Ten more minutes, and then, after that, I kill those two."

Quicksilver had a panicked look in his eyes as he struggled to get out of the ropes. Namor looked down at the reflecting pool his advisor set up and was stunned at what he saw.

His beloved Carol, marrying someone else.

An intense jealousy formed inside the prince's mind and he shot out of the palace, through the ceiling, flooding the inner chamber. He roared with such intensity in the water that, when he surfaced, his roar echoed for miles around. Without thinking, the maddened and jealous prince tore through the skies to the compound.

Under the water, Wonder Man and Vision were swimming as fast as they could. The communications devices both Quicksilver and Beachhead had made them easy to pick up the signal.

**Back to the West Coast Avengers… **

A hologram of a preacher began reading,

"And, for any one that has an objection as to why these two should not be married, let them speak now, or forever hold their peace."

A noticeable rumble was heard and Namor roared,

"WHERE IS HE? WHERE IS THE SURFACE DWELLER THAT DARES TO TAKE WHAT IS MINE?!"

Farrah called out,

"Right there, Subby!"

Namor heard that and through the floor into the Playroom. His eyes were brimming with rage as he saw the wedding in progress. Namor snarled,

"How dare you? What gives you the right to do this to the prince of Atlantis?"  
Farrah grinned,

"Easy. You'll never be half the man Herc is. Why should Barbie have you when her kids with Herc over there can be gods?"

Leon rubbed the bridge of his nose,

"I think this plan is working better than I thought."

Hercules grinned,

"Stupid mortal. I am the great Hercules, the-!"

Namor did not want to hear any more and, flying in the air, landed a powerful blow against the son of Zeus. It was at that moment the other West Coast Avengers jumped Namor and tried to hold him off long enough to ensure Quicksilver's and Beachhead's safety.

**Back on Atlantis… **

The water trail was still fresh as both the ionic Avenger and the android Avenger found the palace. People were running around, trying to plug up the hole that was made during Namor's untimely exit. Wonder Man said,

"Vision, have you found them?"

Vision answered,

"Atlantian readings are similar to human readings, but there are stark differences. I am detecting a human signature and mutant signature near the palace throne room."

The two of them made their way to the throne room, knocking out several of the guards that attempted to stop them. Vision phased through the walls as Wonder Man did his best to restrain the guards.

Once they got to the throne room, Beachhead shouted,

"It's about time someone helped us! Let us out!"

Simon shook his head,

"You don't seem very grateful."

Quicksilver pleaded,

"We are! We are! Just get us out of here! This salt water is ruining my hair!"

As they became freed, a mist enveloped the room and soon, a sinister voice cackled maniacally,

"You mortals have ruined everything I had planned!"

Simon shook his head,

"I know that voice."

The mist cleared and there stood Loki, the god of Trickery. And, he had a magical blast ready to go…

Next Chapter:

Two great battles: The West Coast Avengers vs. Namor and Loki! Stay tuned, fellow readers!


	9. Chapter 9

**Royal Pain **

_Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Marvel or Sunbow Entertainment. I own Farrah/Persiana and Leon/Crisis. Red Witch owns the Misfits! _

Chapter 9: Tale of Two Battles! 

**At the Xavier Institute… **

Ororo Munroe, the white-haired mutant Storm, was busy tending to her garden in the greenhouse. With the ability to control the weather, it was extremely easy to tend to it. In fact, Storm only had to worry about pests getting at her plants.

A voice called out,

"Hey, Stormy!"

And not all of them had six legs. Some of them had two legs. And they were named Shipwreck.

Storm turned around and Shipwreck continued,

"I had to travel through a hurricane to get these flowers! It was worth it!"

The flowers were in a sad state; many of them wilted or were sickly looking. The Joe sailor held them out and puckered his lips,

"Well, aren't you going to let me have a kiss?"  
Storm smirked evilly and dropped a hail storm on top of the sailor. One of the hailstones knocked him out cold…

**In Atlantis… **

Loki lashed out with a magical bolt,

"I will not let you leave here alive!"

The bolt knocked Wonder Man down off of his feet. Quicksilver sped up to the mischievous god and smirked,

"How about a godly wedgie?"

As he went to deliver said attack, however, Pietro grabbed a frightful creature and it began trying to maul him. The speedster yelled,

"Help! Get it off of me! Get it off!"

Beachhead yelled,

"Yo Joe!"

He punched Loki in the mouth and delivered a kick to his gut. Loki stumbled back, and he fell over Quicksilver as he was brawling with the monstrous creature. Vision then restrained Loki and said,

"Dispense with the illusion, Loki."

Loki stuck his tongue out, whining,

"No! You can't make me!"

Wonder Man got up at that moment, shaking his head,

"That hurt."

Beachhead smirked,

"I got an idea on what to do with him. I can't do this to the Misfits, but it'll sure feel good to do it to him!"

Loki swallowed nervously and stammered,

"What are you going to do to me?"

Beachhead smirked evilly underneath his mask and a maniacal laughter soon filled Atlatnis…

**Meanwhile… **

Namor slammed his fist into Hercules,

"You dare take my bride from me! You shall know the true wrath of the prince of Atlantis!"

Crisis grabbed the teen prince from behind, but Namor hit him with the back of his head and delivered a series of quick punches,

"You shall not impede me, surface dweller!"  
Persiana hissed and pounced on the Sub-mariner,

"Leave my boyfriend alone!"  
She scratched her claws into Namor's skin. Namor growled in pain and grabbed the furry feline by the neck, choking her,

"And what makes you think your tricks can hurt me?"  
Just then, the super-strong Atlantian felt a tap on the shoulder. Miss Marvel had a glowing fist and smirked,

"This is for the lame flowers, jerk!"

She delivered a punch that knocked Persiana loose and Namor was sent flying through the compound. Farrah looked up,

"I suppose you want a thank you for that."

Carol sneered,

"I wasn't doing it for you, hairball. I was doing it because I hate the way he came on to me."

Hercules held his head,

"What happened?"

Namor came crashing back down as War Machine and Pulsar both delivered powerful attacks on the prince of Atlantis. He was soundly defeated…

**Later… **

Loki was bitter as he was hog-tied and had little flowers decorated all over his face. Wonder Man and Vision explained to the others that Loki was behind all of this and the Sub-mariner was irate. He disliked being used as a pawn in a trick, and would gladly bring Loki back for a sound beating.  
However, Crystal was not interested in the explanation; she was interested in Pietro,

"Oh, my poor baby! Did Namor hurt you? Did he?"

She was coddling him like a little baby, the mutant speedster's head on top of Crystal's breasts. The blonde princess kept cradling him, smothering him with affection. Beachhead looked at the scene,

"I don't think we'll be separating them for sometime."

Falcon smirked,

"Yeah, it's really scary when Pietro is taken away from her. I can't think of anything scarier."

He walked inside, but came out, seconds later, screaming,

"AAAAHHHH! GHOST! THAT GHOST IS BACK!"

Leon blinked,

"Wait, what ghost?"

Out stepped a young teen dressed in all white, with a white crescent moon on his chest. He is Marc Spector, the Moon Knight. Monica said,

"I see Leon's field replacement is here."

The avian teen panicked,

"That's who's replacing Leon in the field? A ghost?"

Persiana grinned,

"Hey, Moonie! Nice one."

Moon Knight glared in her direction,

"Don't call me Moonie."

Leon extended his hand,

"Well, I'm glad you're going to be on the team."

Vision said,

"I believe it to be wise that we should turn Loki over to SHIELD."

However, as they all turned to find Loki, they noticed the deity of trickery was nowhere to be found.

On a ledge in the distance, however, he stood, waiting, plotting…

End of Royal Pain


End file.
